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Home :: Security

12 Feb 2025

Spreadsheet Harder Security

In response to ongoing concerns about the nation's budget deficit, the Treasury department has issued a directive that when calculating deficits, the sum of 2 and 2 will now be 3.

Technical experts in the accounting industry claimed that the results of addition are set by the laws of mathematics and can't be changed. The Treasury pushed back strongly.

"Accounting rules change all the time," they said. "You changed the depreciation schedule from ten years to five, which is way more than 4 to 3."

"Critical funding to schools depends on getting the deficit under control. School lunches and sports programs depend on it. Think of the children!"

"We are asking for an essential change that we know you can do. Spreadsheet harder and do it."

Industry analysts agreed that the most likely result was a common sense compromise making 2 and 2 be 3½.


  posted at: 10:32 :: permanent link to this entry :: 2 comments
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